Patience and Excepting Change

This evening was a realization that changes are forth coming and that patience and understanding will be to our benefit and tranquility. Though I may have caused you alarm that my driving was somewhat not up to par with some of the decisions I made , I'm not loosing my abilities to cause you any concern. If and when that would be the case I would never put you in any form of danger or harms way.

Listening to David and how a new baby can pull at a young couple trying to appease all the members of their immediate families, brought back some  memories of us doing the same thing and promising each other that we would never do that to Jaclyn. Though the generations come and go the distractions some how always remain the same, wouldn't it be something if somehow the older generation could  do a form of Vulcan Mind read and implant the wisdom and understanding into the minds of the younger generation so that those repetitious distractions could be stop. However, the only true form of learning is to make your own mistakes and learn from them. That is probably the one area of growing old whereby all the lessons that life imposed during its journey are so available to the mind and can be drawn up on so that the mistakes of the past have no place in the present.

I was very surprised when we entered Midnight Mass. Their were no familiar faces and the make up the Parrish was very different than before. Maybe it's just that we haven't attended the way we use to do but the change was very evident to me. It shouldn't bother me but it did. It's just another sign pointing to the fact that many changes are taking place altering the past that we took for granted.

My Christmas gift to you is to be more patient and to try to understand the changes that we both will face and put the proper perspective that all the years together have taught us.

Merry Christmas My love

Sympathy

Sympathy our beloved black & white tuxedo cat for the past nineteen years lived life her way. A loner most of her adult life she was very selective as to what attention she would give to us her family.

When Jill and Jaclyn brought this tiny little kitten home we could have never imagined as to how large she would eventually get. The fact that she was a long hair even made her look bigger. I began referring to her as our baby Huey as to how plump and full body she was. The house was her domain, she would only go out doors to satisfy her curiosity and once satisfied she was back to the security of her house.

For ten years she would share the house with PC but always letting her know that she ruled this roost. Whenever PC would try to dominate her, she would roll on her back swat PCs nose and that was the end of that domination.

Her favorite past time was to look at the birds from our bathroom window all the while thinking that she was this great huntress. Well she did manage to achieve this fantasy at one point in her life both indoors and out doors. While outside when she was somewhat agile she did manage to catch one of those birds that she spent so much time looking at. The proud huntress returned her prey to Jill to let her see that she did do it. Her hunting skills would further be enhanced the night Jaclyn and her friend brought home a white dove that had used for a school project . Not realizing that they didn't properly close her bedroom door, Sympathy  once again got her fantasy, somewhat. When we arrived home there were feathers every where, but the little dove did escape Sympathy's Great Hunt.

These last couple of years Sympathy decide to mellow her disposition. No longer having to compete with PC whom passed away 6 years ago, Sympathy sought attention and even started dialogs with Jill. She would cry out as though she was say "Ma ", blink hers eyes with acknowledgment as to something being said to her  and would spend hours with Jill resting on her key board while she worked. Jill had finally gotten the type of cat that she had hope for. Better late than never.

This past year Sim Kitty as Jill would call her starting loosing her weight though she never complained that anything was wrong she began a regiment of drinking a lot of water. she made it a game of drinking from Jill's glass, then drinking from the bath tub faucet. This continued at an alarming rate since she would no longer eat her food. Our baby Huey was turning into a walking skeleton. The fact that she was holding on was breaking every one's heart for this magnificent cat was no more but skin and bones.

Sympathy made us realize that no can fear death but rather face it, for holding on to every last breath is not good for anyone especially the people you love.

Sympathy you are now again with PC watching over your beloved family. We will all miss you.

I'll See Ya Later

Today after 67 years on this earth Ken Baughman is at peace and unshackled from the restrictions that that life managed to impose on him these past 25 years. His body ravaged by strokes and it's after effects he always found a way to smile and accept what had happened to him. One of the few lines that he could speak  clearly was " Oh whatever … it is what it is " Though he didn't like what had happened to him he always found the strength not to complain about it.

What was amazing is that I would have him remember his past by asking him where was he the happiest, before the stroke or after. His response always was " Now … For Sure ' .  He  appreciated what Jill and I did for him and how safe and secure he was with us. He loved his sister dearly for he understood that she would never let him down and take care of him and that she did.

His legacy is " He handled it with smile and placed a smile on everyone that he came in contact with". Everyone at the nursing facility came up to Jill and told her how nice Ken was to everyone and he will dearly be missed.

I can imagine that today Ken is looking down waving his hand and arm and saying his most famous line " I'll see ya later"!

Garrick

Garrick, these words to you have been along time coming but I just never seem to have gotten around to it. When, you entered Jaclyn's life I was somewhat apprehensive. How could some other man become more important to her than her father? How were you going to give her what I deemed necessary for her? How were you going to give her the love that she was accustomed to? The night that Jaclyn was born I knew that my life was no longer mine and that I needed to do whatever I had to, to make her life as happy as possible.

Though at times my stubbornness has made Jaclyn cry, you have made realize that you are the one that can give my daughter what her father cannot, the love of a Husband that becomes one with her. It has taken me awhile to understand that many of the superficial things I deemed necessary are superficial and not necessary at all. You are loving my daughter the way she needs to be loved and wanted and I couldn't be any happier. I'm writing this on my 35th anniversary because I am now certain that you will continue to love her the way she is accustomed to and bring both of you to a ultimate that only a lifetime of togetherness can bring.

Garrick, whatever life has in store fore both of you, always remember that nothing is more important than the love the two of you share, everything else is meaningless.

At your wedding reception I stated that I wasn't losing a daughter, but gaining a son -in- law. What your love for my daughter has now made me realize is that the two of you are one therefore you are not just a son in law but rather a son in whom I am very pleased and proud of.

35 years and Still Going Strong

Over the years I've written many words and given you what is inside of me. While growing up their was a time that I believed love was going to evade me since it just wasn't happening. Something was just never right and it just wasn't what I wanted until our eyes met and now 35 years latter I'm so grateful that I just didn't settle.

It's amazing how 35 years can come to mind with just a blink of an eye and bring just a warm and heartfelt smile to my face. Every time I look at you I know that glance that so caught my eye 35 years ago was god telling me that I need to look no further because what I wanted was in those eyes that took my breath away. You are as beautiful to me today as you ever were. You have made my life become that magical ride that usually only happens in dreams  and can't wait to fall back asleep to experience it again.

Life hasn't always been perfect but the love between us has kept us focused on what truly has been important to both of us. We have raised a beautiful daughter that brings out the best of both of us. What she has seen in us she is bringing to her marriage so that she to will experience what we have and never have to settle for second best.

Sweetheart, thank you for 35 great years and whatever our destiny holds one thing is for certain our love will keep us together and we will enjoy every minute of it.

Happy Anniversary, with all my love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Being A Dad

For years Jaclyn has wanted me to play dress up. She has had this idea that I could be made to look like Al Pacino in Scarface, so several weeks ago I lamented and told her that she could do whatever she wanted and I would keep my mouth shout.

This past weekend was the Phoenix Comicon which was the venue for her to display her creative magic not only on herself but also on Garrick , Jill and I. As you can see she is excellent in transforming herself and her husband into the pages of the comic book characters that they desire to be. Though I'm too old to become Scarface, Jill and I did mange to get some stares at who we were suppose to be as we walked around the convention floor. I was amazed and proud as could be with the attention that Jaclyn was getting. Many came up to her to take her picture and have a picture taken with her. 

Jill and I couldn't believe that this make believe world was so popular. Jaclyn told us that there were over 75,000 people in attendance and each year it gets bigger. Jaclyn's and Garrick's circle of friends are also into this and they to were incredible with their costumes and paraphernalia. There is a great deal of thought going into making this come about.

For me being a dad and seeing my baby girl  all grown up and doing what she likes to do is the best Fathers day gift I could have received

Parenting and Motherhood

As we talked at dinner, we found ourselves going back in time and remembering. Remembering how my parents wanted to still being parents by bringing us those care packages so that they could feel comfort that we were being feed to their standards.

The conversation led to addiction and how anyone  can get themselves hooked on whatever, dope, crack heroin. I've never been able to understand it but when Anna said that Abbey told her that taking crack gave her a high that was like having the best climax ever and it made some sense as to why do it. Being a parent is tough for you have to have understanding of what your kids are going through yet still trying to instill a strength in them to not give in to superficial fixes that are not fixes at all but destructive.

This rambling does have a point and that is you have taken the position to provide guidance to Jaclyn by simply listening and not trying to impose your will like I always seem to or want to do. I am so rigid as to how things should be I fail to see that things are not as black and white as I would like them to be. You are showing me that sometimes my master plan has to be altered and improvising needs to come into play and not getting upset when that does happen. I spend so much time thinking of how things should be that I don't really see how they are.

The point of this is keep on doing what you are doing for you are a great mom to Jaclyn and I love you more because of it.

Happy Mothers Day

The Day After Your 61st Birthday

Though I didn't write anything yesterday, I found myself compelled to do so today. We awoke to Sympathies usual demands of attention, but rather than just continuing to get up we laid there just holding each other  and knowing that what was once so easy has become an understanding that it is what it is and we will accept what we are allowed to have.

Having Anna and Joe stay with us during this birthday made it more of a festive occasion. Our routine was diverted for the day and made it somewhat special. As you and Anna looked back at all those pictures of times long ago, your youth was before you all the the smiles , all the laughter and all the changes that you experienced. How appropriate that the words " In A Blink of Eye" would bring your entire life before you. I found myself wanting to experience the same so I to looked back at those pictures. I was once again so struck by how beautiful you were and how lucky I was that we were together and had become one. Sweet heart you have given me the life that I dreamed about and I am so grateful that I can call you my wife, my friend my lover.

As I have stated many times before, what is ahead of us will be even better than before.

I love you very much!